Ба́ры деру́тся -- у холо́пов чубы́ треща́т.

If one digs around far enough in Ukraine's panorama of random history, look at the odd things, one can connect all sorts of unrelated dots, add a little bit of  fantasy,  fictional interpretation, and voila : the story leaps off the script ! Events have gone well into the outrageous and unbelievable, information has openly been faked, distorted, and social media is off the charts with innuendo. Why can't it just go back to the most peaceful country on Earth ?
 By the way : some of the very best fresh baked pastries/ ever ! can be found here at this little shop in Kiev. I think it's near the American medical Center (no relation )


Maybe it's just me being bored and feeling weird, wanting to write something outrageous...


Don't get me wrong, but Victor Yanukovych sold himself to the voters, inveigled his image as some sort of master of pragmatism,  was he thought of  as the go -to guy who could  handle the tough business with the Russian Federation ? . Sort of like the John Wayne  version of Politics, except he was a self assured crook, a vicious, double dealing kleptocrat. But if one analyzes the strange sequence of his accession to power, certain basic questions arise, From those questions, one can derive weird derivatives of conjecture..
Certainly the history of Yanukovych in the 1970's is key :late in the 70's or early 80 ish, The whole business of expunging the Yanukovych criminal record, of course now it's like an ember being poked about in the fire of postmortem documentation. Clearly, there was some deal made to elevate Yanukovych : it wasn't simply that he was a rising star. his elevation into the Communist party was realized by a  significant Russian Cosmonaut .
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Georgy_Beregovoy
Georgy Timofeyevich Beregovoy, an interesting footnote in space exploration: he spent four days in space and twice failed to dock with the Soyuz 2 craft, but were there strange forces preventing the docking incident ?There is a rumor that Soyuz 2 was actually a manned mission, rumors of missing cosmonauts who could have gone up as volunteers. Who knows ? There seems to be a blackout if information on the Soyuz 2/3 missions.
there seem to be no photos available of this attempted docking, surely the Soviets sent the guy up with a camera ?  Beregovoy was from
 Yenakieve, Donetsk Oblast, Ukraine, also Yanukovych's home town...
Given the four days, the cosmonaut had to sleep. What were his dreams like ? Did he keep a journal ?
I mean, what's it like to doze off all alone, one of the first men in outer space?
Later, he figured as a footnote in the attempt on Brezhnev's life. The guy had bones, pull.
but he got sent on that important mission even when he was a bad pilot he scored a really bad score on his testing of the simulated docking and maneuvering, why did they send a worse than average solo pilot on such an important mission ?
Yet with all these strange, Post Euromaidan outcomes,  the general panorama of events is well enough understood , the strategy and reasoning of the Kremlin/ Putin. It's all there plain to see. Distasteful perhaps, coldly calculating, but not irrational. Forget about forced deportation, sooner or later they will just squeeze out the Tatars economically, force them into tacit submission, or make it impossible to do business, who knows ? I'm not there now.

But what if one infers the totally bizarre ? What if one delves into the realm of the incredible ?
Is there a potential reason for simply creating a dark zone in Eastern Ukraine? Outside the laws, restrictions, norms even of the Russian Federation ? Is there a reason to make conditions that cause intelligent , caring, thoughtful and creative people to flee for their safety , only to leave gullible older people and angry zealots to arm themselves, align to a cause, in other words become obedient to a fearsome master overlord ? Often it is said that Science fiction becomes reality, but what of fantasy fiction ?

What if an alien civilization, a guild, some other form of Galactic travelers was subtly creating all this manipulation, expressly to capture this particular zone of bleak post industrial society ? I mean seriously I would never believe it, but one could entertain the possibility :

Air landing strips being built without long runways, frequent mysterious cloud formations, thunderheads , villagers telling tales of late night sounds in the sky on dark, moonless nights. Mysterious people arriving to activate abandoned mines in the most central part of the terrorist/ separatist enclave ? Strange factory buildings being built along the Russian Border with Lugansk ?
And later on, Putin and Senior members of the Kremlin wearing strange bulky protective suits on their visits to the Quasi-independent Republic  protectorates ?
What if whole large areas of the reopened mines were fenced off like a prison camp ?
What if strange fluctuations took place in the power grid ?
What if people in the region spoke of the onset of  Humming noise  from the ground, a strange, low impedance noise was constant, keeping some people from sleeping.....
What if news emerged that an alien species had been introduced, that feeds off coal and produces a unique residue that could produce some form of clean fusion power ? What if Putin started to look noticeably younger ?

I can just see Wolf Blitzer in the CNN Situation room " tell me John, is it true that these so called alien worms creatures have been sighted on the surface by Ukraine's Reconnaissance drones ?

Well WOlf : it's alarming, but true that photos have surfaced, still unconfirmed, of giant Millipede- like creatures emerging from these new mines, but the US State Department is categorically denying that there is anything to this, their spokesman even joked that it's a Loch Ness monster story going underground..."

Wolf, "But John, haven't there been some corroborations about the factories along the Russian border, and aren't they identical in size and unit spacing to ones being built now in North Korea ?

John "yes it's true, they are all in groups of five and all spaced the same distance, all aligned precisely  to magnetic North, and the most recent reverse power surge on the Ukrainian grid today coincided with the sizable Earthquake in Crimea, even now we are waiting for reports on the damage"

Wolf, " and John, what about this other situation, the super giant oceanic aquarium being having been hastily built in Yenakieve ? You have independent verification from your sources on the ground of  the formerly Ukraine , now Russian held military Dolphins being moved there ? And is it true they moved those Moscow based Killer whales there, even when one is reported near death ? Why build an Oceanarium in an economically stagnant zone of occupation in Ukraine ?"

John " Wolf, as you know the story written about in Le Monde, about the break through in communications with the Dolphins, that there is a set of Dolphins said to be nearly clairvoyant in communication between species, the Ukranian scientist who left them behind when the Russians occupied Crimea, his wife stayed behind, the Dolphins meant so much to her : he claims that she told him the Dolphins are proving essential in the communication with the purported alien worm creatures"
WOlf  " But John who are these aliens they are eating or processing  the coal ? it is their urine that's the source of this elixir of supposed youth ? Is it also said they are drinking the fracking fluids ? That the fuels being produced go twice as far as normal fuel mixes with the correct carburetor adjustment?
there is also some additional  conjecture about strange  Humans or Humanoids are on the ground constructing the mines and facilities, formulating these powerful fountain of Youth drugs that everybody is clamoring for : it's being said that Bill Gates has tried to obtain some to treat his cancer. Was that Bill Gates or just a look alike that is being shown on the DPR dark web ? His presence is currently unaccounted for other than he is at home in Redmond and resting.



"John Ramos here, (hurriedly ) just wrapping up, it's getting dark here and another salvo of Grad missiles just landed due South of us and we have to get back further into the neutral zone : it's an evolving story. Even today, sets of private jets from Saudi Arabia, China, Tajikstan and North Korea were reported to have landed in Шахты.] No one is saying what this International convocation of Private jets is about, although it's thought to be a form of back door diplomacy to fend off this accelerated schedule of NATO Deployment in Ukraine, Despite his advancing illness, a jet carrying Doctor Henry Kissinger is said to be flying even now to this mysterious meeting in the Russian Federation,  news reports have it they left Vienna an hour ago...

Wolf, "Yes John, that is correct, Doctor Kissinger did depart his hospital with a medical team and a small set of staff members and board a jet out of Vienna. And it's being reported that he will be traveling there and possibly meeting with Vladimir Putin and Victor Yanukovych, along with a representative of the UN High Commissioner, but there will be shuttle diplomacy with Kiev as well, one more strange rumor being that Doctor Kissinger is asking for secret bilateral talks in the Kiev Lavra, so it's pretty much the most bizarre story to emerge in my lifetime: And the first talks will maybe happen just a few hours before the big concert.
WOLF : "And John, can we cut to Candice now Candice, what about the concert shaping up by Mick Jagger and the Rolling Stones in Kiev at Maidan Square?  Is that also going forward in the midst of all this ? And is Lady Gaga still in the lineup, along , unbelievably Polina Gagarina ? Carlos Santana is closing as I understand, yes it's all still quite a mystery who will go on. Sons of the Beatles are a possible, Sean Lennon was spotted in a Cafe just yesterday

Candice , yes Wolf  : it's still a uncertain ~ the Patriarch of the Ukrainian Orthodox Church has asked for the song list by the Stones, they will possibly force it indoors if it includes Sympathy for the Devil....so there is wild speculation for pre buying the indoor tickets at the Palats Ukraina, even though nothing about an after party has been announced...

the show must go on, however outrageous it gets is the sentiment I am hearing,
and  U2 is still, at this time  tentative for Sunday as the opening act for Okean Elzy...

Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul to waste

And I was 'round when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game

I stuck around St. Petersburg
When I saw it was a time for a change
Killed the czar and his ministers
Anastasia screamed in vain

I rode a tank
Held a general's rank
When the blitzkrieg raged
And the bodies stank

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name, oh yeah
Ah, what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game, oh yeah
(Woo woo, woo woo)

I watched with glee
While your kings and queens
Fought for ten decades
For the gods they made
(Woo woo, woo woo)

I shouted out,
Who killed the Kennedys?
When after all
It was you and me
(Who who, who who)

Let me please introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
And I laid traps for troubadours
Who get killed before they reached Bombay
(Woo woo, who who)

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah
(Who who)
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game, oh yeah, get down, baby
(Who who, who who)

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah
But what's confusing you
Is just the nature of my game
(Woo woo, who who)

Just as every cop is a criminal
And all the sinners saints
As heads is tails
Just call me Lucifer
'Cause I'm in need of some restraint
(Who who, who who)

So if you meet me
Have some courtesy
Have some sympathy, and some taste
(Woo woo)
Use all your well-learned politnesse
Or I'll lay your soul to waste, mm yeah
(Woo woo, woo woo)

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name, mm yeah
(Who who)
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game, mm mean it, get down
(Woo woo, woo woo)

Woo, who
Oh yeah, get on down
Oh yeah
Oh yeah!
(Woo woo)

Tell me baby, what's my name
Tell me honey, can ya guess my name
Tell me baby, what's my name
I tell you one time, you're to blame

Oh, who
Woo, woo
Woo, who
Woo, woo
Woo, who, who
Woo, who, who
Oh, yeah

What's my name
Tell me, baby, what's my name
Tell me, sweetie, what's my name my name is rick I say

Woo, who, who
Woo, who, who rick


 

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